Finally I can wrap my phone around my cock, set it to vibrate and call myself.
THAT IS NOT THE INTENDED USE, SIR.
“Killed 99 bears”
a fact that if actually accomplished, should be put on a tombstone.
My favorite part is “We hope he has gone to rest.” What, like… they weren’t sure? Maybe, if ever the bear uprising should start again, he would rise from the ground to finish what he started and slay that 100th bear?
Was this man so powerful they are concerned he might not have decided to rest at all and is simply biding his time?
This is like a tombstone you’d see at the Haunted Mansion I swear
HE HAS A TINY CART OF CARROTS
This is why I have no friends.